The Big Picture

Ask the Guides #6: How to Prepare for Coming Changes?

You don’t have to be an intuitive to know that something big is happening in the world right now. There is a feeling everywhere that things are heightened, whether in the personal or political or energetic sphere. Those who are especially sensitive to energy have been reporting a growing sense of anticipation coupled with a kind of agitation or discomfort—the sense that something is about to shift in a very big way. And then we have the recent volcanic eruptions in Hawai’i, the unrest in the Middle East, and just last night, a minor earthquake in San Francisco. Things, it’s fair to say, are shifting under our feet.

In the spiritual or metaphysical world, in particular, there is a lot of buzz. Some talk about long-prophesied Earth changes that will force us to reconsider our way of life, and others talk about “The Event,” an incoming wave of energy that will raise (or is currently raising) our collective consciousness.

Whatever the case is, change is on the horizon, and it’s good to be prepared. That’s why I chose the following question to bring to the Guides today, from K. who submitted it for my recent birthday raffle. (Thanks!)




K. asks:

What is the best way to prepare for change? And by change, I mean the buzz everyone is talking about a shift in consciousness, an evolution in humankind. 


The Guides respond:


Dear Ones, we would say this. Do not be afraid. That is the number one piece of guidance for anyone anywhere at this time, or really at any time. It is Time for the children of Earth to become aware of their Divine safety, no matter what happens in the outer world, or appears to. Since the fall of man, which is to say the descent of Earth into duality consciousness or separation consciousness, there has been Fear. And Fear is the opposite of Love, which is your nature and your birthright.


Now, we are not talking about small “l” love, the way you do. We are not talking about familial love or romantic love or “Oh my gosh I love that thing so much!” the way you do in your quite charming enthusiasm for this or that. No. We are talking about capital “L” Love, which is a Divine quality that is the basis of the Universe. It is the state of Union. It is the reconciliation of all things into One. It is the Oneness of all Beings. It is the reverence for life that is at the heart of existence. It is Being itself. It is God itself.


Now, all of this can be a cliché, or sound like a cliché, and that is not what we are talking about. We are not talking about living in a pink cloud where everything is dandy and you retreat from the world as it is. No. We are talking about opening yourself up to blaze with the Light of Creation which is your birthright and becoming aware of your Oneness with All that Is. Stepping into your brilliance, which is not about your ego but about your Light. The Light of Love that you are made of and that you were made for, and which you must naturally shower on all that you see, once you become aware of your origins and your True nature. Amen, Amen.


So how do you prepare for the changes that are coming? Well, number one, you Are the change. All of you who are awakening to your true nature, to your glory which is the glory of the Divine, you Are the change. You will bring in the change yourselves as you elevate your vibration to the frequency of Love. So the more you are in harmony with that elevation, the less bumpy that ride will be.


How do you do that, you may ask? How do you come into harmony with that elevation of frequency? Simply do not entertain fear. Do not entertain hatred. Do not entertain separation. Lift above the ordinary consciousness as much as possible through whatever means necessary and stay there as long as you can. Meditation, yoga, creativity, stillness, solitude, laughter—whatever gives you joy and peace. Whatever space you can give yourself to feel uplifted, to feel protected, to feel held, embrace that space and give yourself that state. There is no need to contribute to negativity in any form. Let it go. Do not try to affect outer events. Instead, tend to the inner work, which is raising the vibration and living in the Light.


There is a misconception among human beings that attending to what is “wrong” in the world is how we bring about what is “right.” This is untrue. The way you bring about right is to create the inner conditions through which the outer events are no longer possible. So do not feel guilty about turning away, to some degree, from the outer events of life. To the extent that you give them credence, send them Love. Send them Light. Bless all involved, and by all, we mean all. Every last person, every participant, every faction, every leader. All deserve Love and all deserve blessing. Each one is an actor on a stage, and the play being performed is the greatest in history. So thank them for their Service as a soul, even if the part they’re playing makes no sense to you, or looks like villainy, or scares you to death.


Which brings us back to fear. The number one thing you can do, we say again and again, is stay above fear. Watch your fear from a distance, but do not believe it. Bless your fear as you would bless a frightened child. Affirm your safety, over and over again. Affirm the inherent goodness of All: of all events, of all happenings, of all changes, of all Beings. Because, in fact, this is the Truth. There is goodness in All that Is, and even the Ones playing the darkness, playing the roles of villains, appearing to do great damage, even they are contributing to the change, though not in the way you might like. They are catalyzing the end of the old world by speeding it to its conclusion so the new world may be born. For this, they are blessed, in their own way, as the rest of us prepare to take up the mantle of the new Earth and of the new age and rebuild a world where Love can reign. Amen, Amen.


So, dearest Ones, be of faith. Be of good cheer. Remember your safety at all times. Look upon the world as a mother would: fondly, with forbearance, with an understanding that growth is necessary and sometimes messy. Affirm your faith in the graceful evolution that is happening and is necessary and that sometimes may give rise to fear but which is ultimately designed to vanquish fear once and for all. Keep your eye on the prize, as they say, and the prize is nothing less than the soul’s liberation, the soul’s evolution, as a collective movement into Light.


We send you all Love with a capital “L.” Blessed Be, dear Ones. Be at Peace.



I’d love to hear your thoughts, questions, or comments below or via Facebook! Also, if you’d like more personalized guidance, I’d love to give you a reading. There are still a few days to take advantage of my anniversary special (you have to book before May 19, 2018, but your session can be after that date)!  Just go the the booking page or contact link in the menu above. <3 Thea

Ask the Guides #5: What to Do When We Feel Ourselves Going Backward?



This question is from me, but before I share it and the response from the Guides, I have to tell you about my morning. Because I think maybe you are going to be able to relate.


A few days ago, I got back from an ecstatic five-day retreat at Esalen with Paul Selig, a psychic and channel who is doing revolutionary work raising the vibration of the collective through his livestreams, books, and retreats.


I came back from the retreat feeling high. As in, in-my-Higher-Self high. As I drove home along the coast and then through the oaky hills and garlic fields, everything looked radiant and preternaturally beautiful. I felt so connected to all the amazing people I had shared that experience with. Everything was perfect. All was One. When I greeted my dog at the door—she was the only one home—she leaned into me as if she knew something had shifted.


And then, over the next few days, I started to crash. I was inexplicably exhausted. As happy as I was to see my family, I was also overwhelmed by the noise and demands of domestic life. I just wanted to be immobile on the couch, or else flee back to Esalen, not just to soak au naturel in a hot tub overlooking the Pacific—which was pretty effing awesome— but to recapture that elevated state that felt so delicious and so right.


Then came this morning. There was nothing special about it, except maybe I drank too much coffee and ate too little breakfast before dropping my son off at school and heading to Safeway to pick up Gatorade and granola bars for the middle school track meet like I promised. It was somewhere in the household cleaning aisle, while pondering the mop heads, that I felt an old sense of despair start to drag me down.


What was it, exactly? Existential loneliness? Emotional fatigue? I didn’t know, only that everything felt wrong and everything in front of me, from work to home to life in general, seemed impossibly difficult, like swimming against the current and uphill. This feeling didn’t make sense, but I knew it intimately, and it was discouraging to be back “there” again. Hadn’t I just transcended my lower self for nearly five whole days? Didn’t I know who I really was? How could I have lost hold of that feeling so quickly?


Long story short, I managed to shift the energy as the day went on. I texted with a friend, baked some muffins while listening to one of Paul’s audio books, and got some work done. I also turned to the Guides, who had typically compassionate and useful advice, which I share with you below. I hope you find it helpful, as I did.


Much LOVE to you all,






Q: What do we do in those situations where we feel like we’ve suddenly gone backwards—gotten caught in old feelings, old patterns, a low vibration, the ego self, and/or fear?


The Guides respond:


Love yourself. Now this is a cliché, and not well understood, so let us explain. We do not mean “like” yourself. You may indeed “like” yourself, your personality, or you may not. It doesn’t matter, actually, though this may surprise you. You may have aspects of yourself, your small self, that you would like to change, and you may or may not find yourself able to change them in the moment. That is all right. It honestly doesn’t matter as much as you think.


What does matter is Love, and the ability you have, the action you take, to Love yourself. Now again, this doesn’t not mean “like.” You may or you may not. We are not talking about the spontaneous feeling that arises by itself in like or dislike.


We are talking about Love. And that is an action, a choice, a decision you make in the moment to send yourself Love and in doing so connect with your Higher Self in a way that changes your vibration and shifts your experience of Who You Are.


Let us explain. On the plane of duality, you are both. The lower self and the Higher. The one who suffers and the One who does not. On the plane of unity, what some call the 5th dimension, the lower self is subsumed into the Higher, and there is no conflict, no pain or suffering as you experience it here—no separation. Only Love.


So that is how you treat yourself when you find yourself sinking into the mindset of the lower self. With enormous Love. With enormous compassion. Not judging or analyzing what is happening, but sending it Love as an energetic action through the Self as funded by the Divine. Does that make sense?


Send yourself Love as a mother would, the Divine mother, or the earthly mother who sees her child beyond the child’s moods or behaviors or acting out. The mother who Knows the child’s heart, the tenderness there, the need and the fear, and also senses the grandeur of the child’s Being and worth of the child’s soul. That is You as Love in action, the Mother of yourself, the conduit of Divine love for yourself, as your Self. Do you understand?


This can happen anywhere at any time, in the grocery aisle or in traffic or at the dinner table with your raucous family. Just stop and visualize that Love streaming down on you, no matter the state you’re in, from the Divine that is You, through you and for you, no matter what.


That is Love in action, and it is the force that will unify all the parts of yourself and bring you into alignment with Who You Really Are, day after day. We honor your work and your goodness, and we ask you to be gentle with yourself as we are gentle with you, as a mother would be gentle with her child, knowing that growth is long and hard work and all is indeed well.


Blessings, and Amen.




Spring Equinox 2018: Solar Storms, Energetic Shifts, and Inner and Outer Change

Have you heard about the massive solar storms currently hitting Earth? According to an article in Elephant Journal, “Currently there is a large, 200,000-kilometer wide, canyon-shaped coronal hole that has opened up in the sun’s atmosphere, dividing almost the entire Earth-facing hemisphere of the sun. From this hole, on Tuesday, March 13th, a stream of high-speed solar wind (hot plasma) was ejected, and flew toward Earth at a speed faster than 600 kilometers per second. The highly charged wind has been buffeting Earth’s magnetic field (protective bubble) ever since.”


When there are intense changes in the Earth’s electromagnetic field like this, we can’t help but feel it, even if we don’t know exactly what it is we’re feeling. You may be extra edgy right now, or out of it, or wired, tired, and emotional, all at once. One friend commented, “I feel like I’ve lost the plot.” I know what she means. I, too, have been feeling spacey and unmoored, and at the same time anxious and excited, like something really big is about to happen.


That may be because it is. According to a variety of sources—spiritual teachers, bloggers, and channelers I follow online—a big energy shift or “upgrade” is coming in along with these solar storms. Some call it “The Event” and claim it’s a long-awaited dimensional shift, even the advent of Christ Consciousness on earth. Others are more low-key, saying it’s just another “upgrade,” another wave of Light to help lift us all up on our paths. Either way, it feels like something important is happening.


I asked my Guides for more information to pass along to all of you, and here’s what they said. I’ve highlighted some of the most important points in bold.




Tell them they are Beloved. Tell them this is a time of great Change.


Change is to be expected, inside and out.


Do not be afraid, Beloved Ones. Your time is coming. We are approaching a Time when once again Light will be ascendant on the Earth, and darkness will be vanquished and relegated to its rightful place in the shadows. This will not happen all at once. It is happening now and it will continue to happen as Time continues to pass and to meld into itself.


What is meant by this? Time is rearranging itself and there may be distortions. This is nothing to worry about. Ride the waves of time as you do everything else. Let it Be. The Changes that are coming will be greatly beneficial to those who are of the Light. What took you tremendous strength to move or change before will now shift with a touch of your finger. That is coming. It is not Here yet but it is on its way. Do not fear.


What of the chaos happening on your Earth? Do not intervene. Do not give it undue attention.


What you do attend to, give it Light. Send it Light and not anxiety, not fear, not fretting and hand-wringing. Believe it or not, that nervous energy only feeds the forces that fuel and thrive on chaos, prolongs the life of crises and upsets by giving them undue legitimacy. Do you understand?


We are not saying they (the events in the “real world”) are not “real.” They are, on the level of reality on which they exist. But that level of reality is not the one we are asking you to attend to. We are asking you to attend to the causal level of reality. The energetic level from which all things emerge.


In a sense, when you are focusing on the “what” that is happening in your world, you are looking at the past. That is to say, you are gazing at the products of old thoughts and outdated energies and fretting over them, as if something can be done.


Well, something can be done, but not to those events which already exist and have already been dreamed into being by others (and perhaps by you, to some degree, to the extent that you projected fear energetically into the future at some time in the past). Are you starting to understand the way it works?


Project your energy into the future by envisioning Light, and then let that light-filled future come to pass and become the Now in which you live.


This is your task, and in a sense, your burden, though you will come to know it as a great gift and even a form of freedom over time.


That is to say, you are free to project into the future, in the form of Light, in the form of energy, that which you “dream.” You do this with where you put your attention now. So put your attention on that which you want in the future. Not on your “lack”—that will bring you more lack. The Universe is nothing if not dispassionate in its willingness to bring you that which you have “ordered” via your attention in the past. Via your generating thoughts and energy states. Via the “weather” you have created energetically that has served as a calling card and instructed Spirit how you are to be treated and responded to on an energetic level. Amen.


Now some of you may object to this on technical grounds, or on the grounds that it seems “cruel.” It is not. It is free will and a learning opportunity.


Once you realize you are not “consigned” to a certain reality but instead can become the author of your reality through careful management of your own energy and your own awareness, you are free.


You are free to choose, free to experience, free to lift the veil and see the Truth. This is what we want for you and what you—the larger You—want for yourself. Embrace the new reality and be at peace.


Namaste, Amen.





I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, and your reports of how you’re feeling and what you’re experiencing during this fascinating time! Please comment below or on Facebook, or send me a note!

And if a personal session with me and the Guides would be useful to get you through these times, I would love to help!

Much LOVE to you all,


Ask the Guides #4: Who to Believe, When Spiritual Teachers Disagree?

What do we do when we encounter seeming opposite views about the purpose or nature of life from different spiritual teachers we respect or admire? That’s the thorny question addressed in today’s Ask The Guides.


B. asks:


I am a student and follower of A Course In Miracles, which teaches forgiveness and releasing fear and guilt so we can return home faster to our real home with God—a letting go of this illusory universe.


Recently I read some positive words from Abraham Hicks [a popular channeled teacher] and I loved it but then I started to notice how these guides who teach as Abraham share with students how to manifest things in your life. A Course in Miracles teaches that manifesting is fine, but to remember to forgive because they are all illusions and be careful about making it too “real.” Abraham seems to be more of a proponent of this illusory life, saying let’s live in joy and have all the things we want and we are the leading edge.


There seems to be a deep divide between spiritual teachers about this life and what we’re here for. Am I misinterpreting this?




Dear One,


We thank you for your question and for the purity of heart with which you ask it. We would suggest that both are true. That is to say, that this life is illusory, that the Reality undergirding this human life, this material plane, is much, much greater than anything you can imagine and much, much more significant. That any material gain or material conditions you experience here are vastly overshadowed by the deep significance of your life on a spiritual level. That what is happening on the inside, the inner work, is the closest thing you can get to touching the significance of the spiritual life, the Reality on a soul level, which is the true reality and the only reality that ultimately matters.


Now, at the same time, any “play” that you do on the material level, as long as it is undergirded by energetic truth, is fine and good. The Abraham work which you reference is concerned with the congruence between inner and outer Truth. That is to say, how does your inner Truth influence the outer? How does your energetic state create the outer experience? This is a field of study and a valid one in understanding the power of energy, of intention, of choice. All this is well and good. Some will be more drawn to this type of work than others will be. The critical distinction here is the WHY behind it. That is to say, why are you working with energy? Are you working with energy to make nice things appear in your life which you can enjoy? OK as far as it goes, as long as the things themselves do not become idols. As long as the power itself does not become an idol. As long as one does not judge the path of another who has not yet achieved the ability to do such things. As long as the “trick” does not become the point.


If the play itself is seen as that, as Divine play, we smile upon it. As long as the ego does not become entwined in the “power” of that play. As long as the energy itself is the goal, the awareness of that energy, the honoring of that energy, and the use of that energy to uplift All, to connect All, to experience Oneself as an aspect of the Divine. But not for the sake of the creations themselves. Does this make sense?


Because in the end, the goal is to give up everything. To give up all things. To give up all attachments. To give up all emotions that cause One to suffer. To return, in total, to the energy of the Divine. To total Oneness. There are many paths to this end, and many, many lifetimes needed to complete this journey. Do not be concerned about the “right” way. The “right” way is the Way that you are on, with its twists and turns, its up and downs, its moments of darkness and Light. Play as you see fit. Pray as you see fit. Know your reality as an illusion, and enjoy it, yet, to the extent that you can. Honor the energy and the Love undergirding it all, and know that level as the Reality to which you will return, and the One to which you must attend, in the end, above all else.


Know yourself as blessed, and a Child of God. Thank you, and Amen.

Ask the Guides #3: How Do We Respond to Mass Shootings?

Heartbroken and soul-sick in the wake of another senseless school shooting, I decided to bring to the Guides the question I imagine is on the minds of every reasonable person and parent in this country.

I asked:

“How do we respond to these horrific, repeated events? Like everyone, I feel sickened and helpless. Part of me wants to turn away. I can’t stand to live in a culture like this, one that would allow this to happen to its children. Even seeing it through a “spiritual lens” feels like a cop-out, like an attempt to justify it or minimize the horror.

How can we possibly understand this? What can we do?”




The Guides respond:


First of all, honor your heart. It is your human heart, your tenderness, that you are feeling. Underneath all the feelings, all the rage and helplessness, is hurt. How can they do this to me, to us, to our children? Don’t they see? No, they don’t. But you do. You who hurt, who grieve for lost souls and lost lives. That open-heartedness is your treasure, your gift. Without it you would lose the ability to love, as others have. So cherish your open-heartedness, for it is the answer to humanity’s woes.


Now, what do you do with your heartbreak? How do you respond? This will depend on the person. Some will be motivated to action. Others will be guided to actions of Light. Still others will make art, or music, or speak out in their way. Do not judge each other for the contribution each one makes. Each One has his role, her talent or gift.


But do not descend into rage. It is rage that pulls the trigger, rage that smashes windows and punches others in the face. Rage says, “There is nothing we can do and so I will explode, will make you the cause of my suffering and its terrible target.” Do not go there, as they say.


Neither descend into fear. It is fear that multiplies fear, that proliferates guns, that descends into silence. Fear cowers in the corner or arms itself to the teeth. Fear is the human heart closing in on itself, and that does no one any good.


So what do you do? Lift it up. Lift it up into the Light. Now, some of you reading may find this “Pollyanna,” may think it is an excuse, and we understand. But hear Us out. What we are prescribing is a very deliberate action of the consciousness that will have an effect, we assure you.


Think of the shooter. Lift him up into the Light. Honor his humanity. See him as a Child of God who has gone astray. Now, you may not “like” this. That is OK. You don’t need to like it. You don’t need to feel comfortable. But try it, as a practice. Send Light to his soul and to his human self which is broken beyond repair, in a sense. Reaffirm his status as a Child of God and you will shift on a spiritual level and so will he.


Same with the victims. See them as eternal. Bless their suffering. Shower it with Light. That doeesn’t mean “like” it. Of course you are are horrified. But sending it Light, sending them Light, bathing them in Divine Love, will lessen their pain and everyone’s pain and redeem them in the Light. What do we mean by redeem? We mean untouched. We mean restored. Returned to their wholeness in the Light, untouched by the horror of events. Say their names, look at their faces, and send them Light.


Now what of the lawmakers, and those who support them? This is the hardest of them all, in a sense. How can they allow it? How can they continue to dabble in fear and death? Because of fear. Fear, fear, fear. Fear and greed. And what fights fear? Only Light. What fights greed? Only Divine abundance.


So send them Light. Wish them Divine abundance. Never mind your aversion to their actions and to their words. Claim them for the Light. You can say it aloud when you see them on the TV or hear them on the news. “I claim you for the Light. I see you in the Light. I elevate you to the level of Light.”


This may sound frivolous, but it is not. Everything you hate, send it Light. Everything you oppose, send it Light. Everything you fear and abhor, send it Light. Send light to tragedy, to hatred, to bigotry, to ignorance and fear. Meeting those things on their own level only assures they will not change.


Meeting them with Light, however, will effect change. When you meet something with Light, when you hold someone in Light, you elevate them to a higher vibration. You create a spark of consciousness. This happens across time and happens across space. It is not “magic” but more like a law of physics you haven’t quite proven yet. That consciousness changes belief, and the action of Light, performed for another, has profound consequences over time and space.


And then “thoughts and prayers,” when done deliberately and not as a platitude or panacea—when the thoughts are “You are Divine” and “I See you in the Light” and “I hold you in the Love of God,” and the prayer is an active shifting of deliberate perception, an elevating of what is seen into the Light—then those “thoughts and prayers” have tremendous power to change the world.


We bless you souls in your suffering and grief, in your (seeming) helplessness, in your violence and loss. We honor your tender hearts and we hold you in the Light as the Sons and Daughters of God that you Are. We ask you to do the same for your brethren everywhere, at every level of consciousness, every status of behavior, every political leaning or level of development they may possess or exist at. Send them Light. Send them love. Affirm their humanity and their Divinity and their inclusion in the Family of Light.


That, above all, will heal the world and bring it to its rightful place into the Light. We bless you all and accompany you, now and always. Amen.

Ask the Guides #2: Monogamy and Polyamory

In the second installment in our new advice column, the Guides address open relationships vs. exclusivity—just in time for Valentine’s Day!




H. asks:


I have a question about monogamy versus polyamory. I see a lot of articles in the media on polyamory and open relationship and it seems to me that it is becoming in vogue again, kind of like in the Sixties, and that many people are experimenting with new ways of being in relationships. I am wondering what is happening when you are not exclusive in your love relationship, and if it is possible to maintain deep intimacy or if the relationships get watered down by having multiple partners.

Many people are cheating on each other anyway and so allowing affairs can seem like a protection in a way. And yet so many still want monogamy and hold on to the idea of exclusivity and dream of “the one and only.”

Finally, what do you do if one partner wants monogamy and the other doesn’t? I would love to hear what the guides have to say about this topic.




The Guides respond:


Dear Ones,


In a sense, love on the human plane is like a playground. There is a lot of freedom. Freedom to choose, freedom to experiment. And like a playground, there is the risk of getting hurt. One may stretch too far or overestimate his or her limits or abilities, and there will be a consequence. One may fall down. One may end up injured. One may then look at the playground differently next time, may say, I’m not going to try that again.


So we would counsel you to be objective in terms of what each one chooses and why, what each one may be learning and how. There are easier and harder ways to learn, and each soul makes his or her own path. This is not just true in relationship, but it is especially true in relationship.


So, your way and another’s may be different. Your way and another’s may be compatible or they may not. The question is, what’s right for you? If you are monogamous and your partner is not, you may have a problem. It doesn’t matter what is “right” in an objective sense. What matters is that your boundaries are likely to be violated. If you are willing to give of yourself exclusively and another is not, that is a recipe for injury. Why would you give fully of yourself to someone who is not willing to give fully to you? It is a choice you can make, but the question is, how does it feel? Does it feel good? Is it what you want? Are you willing to ask for what you want? These are the questions that matter, because these are the questions that will lead to growth.


Now, can a person remain deeply intimate with another while in an open relationship? Yes and no. The intimacy there is likely to include all the feelings provoked by the other connections the person has. So that is a sort of intimacy, in a sense. The intimacy to feel rage or jealousy or desire or whatever other feelings must also be present when there is more than one romantic connection. This is a kind of intimacy, but it is much more difficult than the “simple” intimacy between two people, which we know is not actually simple at all. Either way you will grow. It is simply a matter of how.


As always, there is no “right” or “wrong.” Everything is of God. But not everything is of you, or for you. That is to say, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks or believes or values or does. What matters is what you want, what you are willing to say yes to, what you know in your heart is best for you. Go deep into yourself and ask yourself what’s true for you, and listen to the answer.




I’d love to hear your thoughts, reflections, and comments! Leave a comment below or on my Big Picture Guidance Facebook page!

And on this upcoming Valentine’s Day, may you know yourself as Beloved no matter what!



Ask the Guides #1: The Role of Parents

(Yes, in case you were wondering, that IS a picture of me. You’re welcome.)


All-new feature on my blog—ASK THE GUIDES!


For a long time now, I’ve wanted to add an advice column feature to my blog, where people can submit general questions and I can share the Guides’ answers. To kick it off, I’m sharing a question about parenting I got from a client on Facebook. Thanks for the great question, M.C.!



M.C. asks:

“Most parents believe that they are to require total obedience from their children. That letting them decide what to eat or when to go to bed, for example, would rob them of a feeling of security and that they’d lack structure. And yet, it is my belief that children come to the world with their own innate knowing of what they need to do to be in balance. How can you respect a child’s freedom to express himself and experiment without making him/her do things he/she doesn’t want to do?”


The Guides respond:

The key point with children is to recognize them as souls who are separate and distinct from you. You have entered into a contract with them/their soul to be their parent, to take care of their basic needs, to care for them, to be with them for this part of their journey. That is all. In other words, you are free and they are free.

What do we mean by free?

We mean that you are not responsible for their souls or for their human path. You are not responsible for their choices. You are not responsible for Who They Are or who they will become—although most of you feel that you are. All you are responsible for is being responsible to them—caring for them and facilitating/easing their passage through this life as a child and young adult to the extent that you can and that you feel comfortable with.

Not controlling them. Not “influencing” them. Not trying to “mold” them. But being with them and around them and teaching them as appropriate. Setting limits as appropriate.

The key distinction here is intent. Have the intention to let them be free and to feel free yourself. Have the intention to see them as a soul on their journey, as you are, too.




Please share your comments and thoughts below, or on Facebook. I’d love to hear what you think!


When Life is Not “Fair”

As you may know, I’ve been spending a lot of my time lately going through notebooks full of wisdom from the Guides. I have piles of them (see above). For years before I started doing readings for other people, I was consulting the Guides privately, asking my own personal questions and getting pages full of answers. It was like having my own posse of spiritual advisors, which was awesome!

Reading through these notebooks now, I am astonished by how universal and relevant the guidance still is, how much bigger than me and my personal stuff it always was. (As a side note, I am really excited to compile that guidance into materials I can share with you, whether it’s in online courses or e-books or video. I will keep you posted!)

In the meantime, I just have to share with you a section I found yesterday, which really caught my breath. It comes from a time in my own life when I was struggling to accept a certain difficult situation that I couldn’t seem to change, no matter what I did. I was frustrated and sad and venting in my notebook. Why does it have to be this way? How do I withstand this? I hate it.

In response, and like they do sometimes, the Guides gave me a bit of a compassionate ass-kicking. It was unequivocal and bracing and it still jumps off the page for me, even today. Because life’s seeming unfairness, whether in our own personal sphere or in the world, is a question that’s always with us, and one that can be pretty difficult to come to terms with.

So here’s a little “tough love” from the Guides, for those times when life is feeling unfair, for whatever reason. I hope it’s as helpful for you as it was for me!




This is the road your soul chose for you. There are no mistakes. There are no errors. Just because you had some other reality in mind doesn’t mean something now is “wrong.” It is not wrong, it is. It is because it is, in other words; it’s meant to be. It is God’s will, it is the soul’s will (or the souls’ will)*.

Your ideas of what you wanted and what you needed were just that, ideas. Your ideas. Not our ideas or God’s ideas. They were, in effect, an invention of your own, a desire you created into a wish and then into a future you somehow believed must come to pass. Because it “should.”

But as you may notice, life does not operate that way. What happens is not very often what we believe “should.” There is not always “justice,” or what we (as humans)** believe justice to be. In fact, it is rarely that way. The scales do not “balance.” Life is not “fair.”

How do we come to terms with that “unfairness” without losing our sense of faith, our sense of hope? It is not easy, but it is necessary, in order to continue to grow and evolve. Too many people fall into despair and cynicism, deciding that because life is not “fair” then there is no God, no purpose, no justice or mercy.

This, while perhaps understandable, is spiritually immature. To insist that life is “fair” is, in effect, to have a spiritual temper tantrum. It is saying, “It must be my way, and if it’s not going to be my way, then I am going to quit, take my toys and go home.” Life requires more of you than that. Cynicism is too easy. Giving up is too easy. They are each a form of pouting, a form of protest, a turning away from life.

The spiritually mature person faces—and even embraces—life as it is. That requires grief. One can’t embrace what is without grieving what has been lost, even if that loss is just of an idea.

So let yourself mourn what you imagined and do not have. This is necessary in order to let go of what is not to be and to come to a greater sense of peace with what is.


A few footnotes:

*the Guides say “the soul’s will, or the souls’ will” to indicate that when it’s a situation involving another person or other people, their souls are willing it, too.

**Sometimes the Guides refer to themselves as “We” with a capital W, to indicate their difference from us. At other times, they use “we” with a lowercase “w,” to mean “all of us,” them and us too. I think they use the lower case “we” here as a gesture of solidarity, as so as not to talk down to us, which they seem loathe to do.




Now, in retrospect, I can say that the Guides’ advice was spot-on. I went through a period of mourning after receiving this guidance. Once I spent time grieving the situation I was struggling with, which was not something I could change, my relationship to it shifted dramatically. I found much more acceptance, gratitude, and peace. Today I wouldn’t change a thing (most of the time, anyway).

This guidance also transformed the way I look at the world beyond my own life. The seeming unfairness of the world is still painful, and even heartbreaking at times. There are times all we can do is grieve, and work toward social justice in whatever way speaks most to us.

But the Guides’ words—the spiritually mature person faces—and even embraces—life as it is—have stuck with me, and ever so slowly changed my life. Today I have a much deeper sense of acceptance even for those things that are truly difficult. More and more, I can feel the sense of being carried along by the Divine, of the soul intelligence behind the unfolding of events, even if they are not always to my liking. And that is truly a gift.



I’d love to hear your comments here or on Facebook, and if you’re looking for more personalized guidance, please check out what I do and even book a reading!

Much LOVE to all of you,

“It is Time to Step Into Your Own Power:” #MeToo, the Rise of Women, and the Fear of the Divine Feminine

Some years ago, the Guides told me this:

There is a darkness in front of you that has to do with your father and with your relationship to men. You have given up too much. You have looked to them for guidance, support, self-worth. You have deferred too often to them. You have allowed your identity, to some degree, to be defined by them. Now it is time for that to end.

It is time for you to step into your own power.

I have been thinking about these words a lot over the past week. With all the revelations about sexual assault and harassment in the news, and with gender politics at the forefront of our national conversation in so many ways, the question of women and our relationship to power seems more relevant than ever.

In my own life, too, the issue has been coming up more and more. And it’s a little confusing. You see, I already think of myself as empowered. I am a feminist and I have been since college. I speak up. As a girl I was often called “bossy.” Now I surround myself with people who like strong women, including my awesome husband.

But on a deeper level, I know there is truth to the guidance. In subtle ways, I hold myself back, especially in domains that seem traditionally male, like money and public recognition. I sometimes stop myself just before reaching sought-after goals, or avoid speaking my truth for fear of others’ reactions. At times, I’ve convinced myself I didn’t want something because secretly I was afraid of what would happen if I got it.

In my professional life most of all, I’ve often found myself driving with the brakes on without really understanding why. Moving into a position of authority brings up an unnamed dread in me, way down deep.

What am I so afraid of?

According to the Guides, it’s my own power. And apparently I’m not alone. There are legions of us, the Guides say, who, because of lifetimes of karma, because of patriarchal history, because of childhood experiences, have learned to equate power of any kind with danger, abuse, and loss of love. And so we tend to turn away from our own innate authority, denying ourselves what is rightfully ours, and avoiding giving our gifts fully to the world.

It’s time, the Guides tell us, for that to change.




We Must Stop Protecting Others

The Guides say:

It is time for you—and many women—to live in the truth of who you are, and to stop imagining that you must protect others from that truth. This is something you have known for a long time but have not been able to bring out into the light. It feels—has felt—too dangerous.

This guidance came long before the Harvey Weinstein allegations and the resultant #MeToo campaign, but I can’t help linking the two. (For the record, I was one of the lucky ones, but yes, I too was groped, flashed, masturbated at and followed in a threatening way by teen boys and grown men, not to mention bent over and spanked in a middle school hallway by my male 7th grade teacher in an apparent “joke” that for years filled me with secret shame.) Living in a female body can feel dangerous, and speaking out about what happens to us is dangerous, too. We’ve been maligned, silenced, and vilified by those who sought protection from their own ugly behavior toward us. Hopefully that pattern is now beginning to change.

But what about all the other, less overt ways we hide our own power, or defer to men?

Who are we protecting from the truth of who we are? And why? Why does showing who we really are—in all our power and glory—feel so damn dangerous?

My family growing up was pretty traditional. My father had most of the apparent authority. He wasn’t abusive, but you didn’t dare argue with him. He actually used to say, “My way or the highway.” He also had a fragile ego, which he covered up with a polished, competent, genial exterior. Like a benevolent dictator, he was charismatic and generous until you crossed him. (He was a thousand times the man than Trump is, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t see any similarity between the two—and although I cringe to admit it, I was sort of the Ivanka to his Donald, the pleasing, favored daughter whom he secretly thought was hot.)

I didn’t see any of this then, not consciously. I just adored my dad and didn’t want to lose his love, which always seemed tenuous, so I tried to shore him up by being the daughter I thought he wanted. Even as an adult, I tended to play small around him, agreeing with him more than I really did, helping him feel good about himself. Whenever I challenged his notion of who I was or what was true, if I seemed too honest, too weird, too ornery, or too opinionated, I could feel the emotional danger between us rising. Once, when I decried the GOP’s increasingly hostile treatment of women, he almost hung up on me. Our relationship was never quite the same after that.

This is the story of my own family, but it’s also the story of the patriarchy. Of men not wanting to be questioned, and women going along to get along, or being forced underground, or getting cast out.




The World Is Splitting Open

Poet Muriel Rukeyser once wrote, “What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life? The world would split open.”

The world appears to be splitting open, and it’s messy and thrilling and volatile. Just look at the huge Women’s March, at feminists getting rape threats on Twitter, at Malala getting shot and rising again, at Hilary Clinton and “Lock her up!”

We’re tapping into something very old and deep here, people: buried power and threat and deep-seated fear. And some of us—many of us—have been struggling to break through it all on the inside for years, whether we have been fully aware of it or not.

For me, the struggle has mostly shown up in my work. As a writer of personal stories, the burning need to speak emotional truth has long bumped up against subterranean forces I couldn’t quite name. I’ve managed to push through, publishing poems and essays and helping my students do the same. But there’s always been that invisible headwind I couldn’t quite identify, that sense of lurking risk. The danger I’ve sensed isn’t just about telling the truth, though that’s part of it. It also seems to be about claiming the right to speak. The sheer audacity of it.

Crazy, right? It’s easy to feel like a throwback to a retrogressive era or a traitor to my feminist politics just for admitting this.

But thanks to the Guides, I understand there is something bigger here, something ancient. The transformation we are going through as women and as a culture is a profound reordering and leveling of the hierarchies we have lived with for generations. For millennia, even.

I have come to think of it this way: that my soul chose my childhood, with its Father Knows Best quality, and simultaneously endowed me with a deep innate drive for truth and authority. Given that tension, I was compelled to move through this archetypal transformation on an internal level—fighting my way from “good little girl” to powerful, outspoken woman—as part of the same seismic shift unfolding in the larger world.




Fear of the Divine Feminine

So yes, one by one and as a group, women are rising, claiming what we know, what we see, and what we have to offer. As our power increases, the internal and external obstacles continue to present themselves, and we must continue to name them and fight through them, for the good of all.

The latest struggle, for me, has been coming out of the closet spiritually. This may seem to have nothing to do with gender, but for me, it does. Beginning work as a professional intuitive, publicly claiming the authority to know or see things for others, felt “presumptuous” and transgressive at first, according to the old internalized narrative of staying small and not making waves.

Ironically, my new work is less ego-driven than anything I’d done in the past. It springs from a very deep place of wanting to serve, to share what I knew and to lift others up.

Still, there’s an element of danger. For days after I launched my website, I woke up in the morning filled with panic. What have I done?

The Guides responded this way:

See [your resistance] for what it is—an ancient fear of the Divine Feminine. That is, the fear of others of that power, and therefore your fear of them and their reaction. It is the specter of being harmed or being silenced. The heartbreak of past losses, primal losses. The silence and demeaning of women of power. The “burning of witches,” so to speak.

There are those who represent the fearful, repressive male power of the past. Those in the thrall of the ego, who feel threatened and diminished by the threat of real female power. That is the battle you are facing now, internally.

How do you respond to those who would belittle or demean you, even in energy? How do you hold your power? How do you define who you are and what you do? How do you hold the good of what you do?

For those who want to claim our own power, that question is critical. How do we hold the good of what we do?

How do we know ourselves as good, and understand that the power we seek—to be heard, to be respected, to lead, to create positive change—is not the same as the power that has been abused by others in the past?

How do we, as women, and others who have been marginalized and silenced, redefine what power means, and claim it fully for ourselves and for the benefit of all?




Claim Your Inheritance

I’ll admit I’m still working on this. I study women leaders in the public eye and try to soak in how comfortably they hold their authority, how confidently they embrace their power for the good. I remind myself over and over again that my intentions are positive, that whatever power I have is not actually dangerous, that I’m only butting up against old, ingrained stories that will take time to overcome.

I do my best to envision the new world we are creating, one where power means power with and power for, and not power over.

And I read these words of the Guides, over and over again:

You are forging ahead, blazing a new path. It is not easy. You are breaking up years and lifetimes of pattern and karma. It is time to stop protecting weakness in others. It is time to step forward in strength.

Claim your power, claim your inheritance. You have earned it. You have worked for it.

Your power is for good. Use your heart for good. Use it to protect those who truly require protection, not those who must now stand up on their two feet.

The time has come for a reckoning. Step out of the way. Do your own work. Let your voice be heard. Shine.




May you all shine bright, and let your voices be heard.

Much LOVE,


8 Quick Ways to Lift Your Spirits and Raise Your Vibration

In times like these, it’s more important than ever to consciously lift our spirits, raise our vibration, and find peace amid the chaos. After all, we can only contribute to the world in positive ways if we ourselves don’t fall into despair.

Here are eight SIMPLE ways to brighten your mood, lighten your outlook, and quickly reconnect with Who You Really Are, a soul who came here to bring Light to the world.

You can practice these techniques anywhere: while sitting on a bus, in traffic, at the gym, or wherever you find yourself with a few extra moments to spare. Try one today, and let me know how it goes!


1. Send blessings to strangers.

This is my favorite, and something I like to do while I’m driving. I’ll look out at the sea of cars and mentally bless all the people in them, choosing to seem them all as worthy souls on a difficult human journey. I sweep my eyes from car to car—or from person to person in a crowd—and say, in my mind, Bless you, bless you, bless you. It immediately lifts my mood and makes me feel great. Plus it makes driving SO much more enjoyable!


2. Pray for someone else.

This is a great one for when we’re feeling low for whatever reason, especially when life feels kind of crummy. Just think of someone who is having a tough time—whether it’s a friend who is sick or struggling, a group of total strangers halfway across the world, or the people in the accident that’s holding up traffic—and say a prayer for their well being, or safety, or healing. Not only does this help them on an energetic level, but it will also lift your spirits by connecting you with your soul’s essential nature of generosity and Oneness with others.


3. Do a small, kind thing.

It’s cliché, but it’s true: little acts of kindness can make all the difference. Whether it’s holding the door for someone, paying for a stranger’s coffee, donating to a good cause, or just making eye contact and offering a real smile, one small gesture can turn the whole day around both for you and for someone else.

Right around the time the travel ban was first announced, I happened to cross paths with a young, hijab-wearing Muslim mother in the produce section at Trader Joe’s. She had the most beautiful little boy, sitting quietly in his stroller, and I told her so. For a moment afterward, she and I just held each other’s gaze and smiled. It was a tiny thing, but it moved me deeply and lifted my spirits. I hope it did the same for her.


4. Make a gratitude list.

Another cliché, but so powerful. You don’t even have to write anything down. Just mentally list ten things you’re grateful for. Halfway through, your mood will start to lift. That’s because gratitude is a higher state of consciousness, and automatically shifts you into a more soul-based perspective, which is a happier place to be.


5. Make your list longer.

Stuck in the line at CostCo or at the DMV? Return to your gratitude list, but this time go beyond the usual suspects. See how long you can make it. The more things you start to add, the more you’ll start to appreciate just how many things we have to be thankful for. Clean water. Shoes. Sunshine. Glasses. A phone. Dry socks. A working heart. A working mind. As you add to your list, notice what happens to your mood and your state of mind.


6. Practice being grateful for something hard.

Hardships, as we all know, can contain hidden gifts, and once we begin to really see that, our lives are transformed. Want to really lift your spirits? Think of something difficult in your life or in the world, and say a little thank you for it. You don’t have to mean it, or like that thing, or agree that it’s good on a human level. All you have to do, in saying your inner thank you, is open yourself up to the possibility that there is more going on than meets the eye. The Universe will rejoice, and you will feel a major bump in your energy.


7. Find some beauty.

Was that last one too tough? Then try this one. Just look for something beautiful around you and take a moment to truly acknowledge it. A child’s face, a leafy tree, a cloud, a piece of music, anything will work. Stop, breathe it in, and feel the elevation in your mood and spirit.


8. Say “Hi” to the Divine.

Just like they say in AA, your Higher Power can be whatever you feel comfortable with. Whether it’s nature, the Universe, Spirit Guides, or God, there’s something out there supporting us, and when we acknowledge that, when we reach out in greeting to the Divine around and within us, something amazing happens. We start to feel warmer inside, and less alone, and we may start to perceive a subtle sense of magic or meaning growing day by day. This might take time, and it’s different for everyone, but I strongly encourage you to say “hi” to the Divine as you conceptualize it, and see what happens.


If you try any of these, please leave a comment and let me know how it went! I’d LOVE to hear!

And if you’re needing more help, looking for personalized spiritual support, or just want to receive helpful, loving messages from your Guides, consider booking an intuitive reading session with me! I’d love to connect with you and assist you on your journey!


Much LOVE to you,