The Big Picture

How it All Started, Part 1

When people hear about my intuitive work, the main thing they ask is how I got started. How did I know I could access Higher wisdom through writing?

Intuitive work is a bit out of the realm of the ordinary. It doesn’t always fit with our everyday understanding of the world or with the way things are supposed to work, according to our rational minds anyway.

And yet, when most of us hear stories that point to a deeper reality–prophetic dreams, signs from dead loved ones, gut feelings that turns out to be eerily accurate–we tend to sit up and pay attention. Because we’ve almost all had moments from our own lives that felt that way.

Times when we just knew something. Times when a coincidence couldn’t be explained away. Moments when we felt–or just knew–there was something more. 

Such windows to the unseen world can unfold in surprisingly ordinary ways. Mine certainly did.

•••

I was about twenty-five, living in San Francisco and working as a public school English teacher. When I wasn’t teaching, I was sitting at my lonely desk in my apartment, trying to figure out how to become a writer. Like many strong-willed and impractical young writers, I had an ambitious plan and a timeline. I was to craft a collection of beautiful, important short stories as quickly as possible so I could realize my dream of becoming an under-30 literary sensation.

I couldn’t understand why it was going so poorly. Or why I was so miserable.

(For the writers who are reading this, we’ll just pause for a minute so you can catch your breath from laughing. Better now?)

What I didn’t know at the time was that I was way too impatient and much too inexperienced to succeed in my plan. Not to mention the fact that I was not a natural fiction writer.

I had other problems, too. One was the inconvenient fact that every time I turned inward—really listened to myself—I felt an upwelling of intense emotion I couldn’t name. Instead of working on my stories, I ended up crying, or journalling about why I was crying and how frustrated I was. It was miserable, and it went on for a long time.

It was during one of those miserable moments that I decided to give up. To surrender. I’d always had a belief in God, or the Universe, or a Higher Power, so to turn inward in that way wasn’t strange to me. It was weird that I felt brought to my knees over writing, but whatever. I was desperate.

So I put down my pen and prayed. Tell me what to do, I pleaded, closing my eyes and turning my face upward.

I didn’t necessarily think anything was going to happen, but it felt good to stop struggling. To admit I needed help.

It was a few moments later, just sitting in silence, when I began to hear unfamiliar words forming in my head.

“Hear” is not quite the right word. I didn’t hear sounds, or an audible voice, or some other entity speaking. It was more like certain words just appeared in my mind. I sensed them. They were there, and I wrote them down. The words had their own momentum, their own forward movement, one word or phrase appearing after the next.

At first, it wasn’t all that different from being in the creative flow, that delicious state when the words just come on their own. That’s what I thought was happening, and that was fine with me. It felt good to get words on paper. At least I was not stuck and suffering.

In fact, for the first time in a long time, I felt opened up. Free. Broken out of the prison of my mind and the pain of my heart.

So I let the words flow, page after page, and after a while, I reread what I had written. It was then I began to realize something unusual was going on. Something other than free association. Something bigger than free writing.

These words were not mine. They didn’t sound like me. They were formal, almost eloquent, and wise. They were addressing me, and they had an insistence, a direction, a message to convey.

As though someone, or something, were answering my prayer. Just like I’d asked.

As though someone or something was telling me what to do.

It made me shiver a little bit, even as I questioned whether it was really real.

•••

In the next post, Part 2, I’ll tell you what that answer was, and what it set in motion! In the meantime, thanks for reading! Please leave a comment or share this with a friend to help me spread the word!

One Big Reason for Hope, or What the Guides Told Me Right After the Election

 

We are living through such an intense time right now. Many of us feel deeply unsettled by changes we see going on around us, by the deep divisions in our society, by the rise of fear, dishonesty, injustice, and chaos.

It’s hard to know how to respond, how to proceed in our ordinary lives. Even if we get active, speak out, and stay informed, it can all still feel pretty overwhelming, destabilizing, disheartening, and exhausting.

It’s hard to stay hopeful, or to know what to do.

 

photo credit: Sandhya Adnepos

 

Turning to the Guides

The day after the U.S. presidential election, the first thing I did was turn to the Guides.  I sat down at my desk, lit a candle, and vented my shock and dismay for a while on the page.

Then I took a deep breath. “It feels like a dark and scary time,” I wrote. “What do we need to know about this?”

Here’s some of what the Guides said:

You need to know that not all is as it appears. That within darkness or from darkness comes great Light. You may not see this now. It will take time. It may be hard to recognize. But rest assured, through this Darkness a great Light is being born.

The Light of consciousness. The Light of—yes—Hope. The Light of people coming together to fight ignorance and fear. Not with weapons but with words, and with Love. You will see a great Movement arise. You will be part of this Movement. You ARE part of this Movement.

Sometimes it takes a great Darkness to spur on the birth of an equally great, or greater, Light. That is the moment you as a nation are facing now, and it is not easy and it will take time.

Trust in the outcome even though you don’t yet see the path. We are with you, we are lighting your way every step of the way.

 

The Importance of Getting a Higher Perspective

Remember, this was November 9. It was months before the Women’s March, before the travel bans, before postcards or town halls or the word Resistance. I didn’t know in that moment what the Guides meant when they talked about a Movement–they were very deliberate in their use of the capital “M”–and in fact even now, I suspect their use of the term both includes and transcends the political sphere. That the Movement they speak of is, as much as anything, a movement of hearts.

But what their guidance reminded me, as always, is that there is a bigger picture, cosmically speaking.

That even on the darkest of days, there is solace and relief to be found in glimpsing our lives from the level of the soul.

And that’s something, it seems to me, we could all use right now. A sense of what in the hell (or Heaven) is going on, what it means, and why maybe, just maybe, despite the worry and dismay so many of us feel, everything is going to be OK.

That’s the perspective I bring, through the Guides, to my coaching clients, and also one I will explore here. I’ll also share more of what they said after the election in an upcoming post!

 

Not a Pollyanna Perspective

When I say “things are going to be OK,” I don’t mean perfect, or easy, or that anything is simple or easily resolved.

Because the Guides have a very different way of looking at human life, and human timelines, than we do. As you will see, they are interested in soul growth over lifetimes, and not so much in a lack of suffering in the short term. They are deeply compassionate toward our pain, but at the same time they understand that the pathos of human life is how we learn.

In this way, their perspective can take some getting used to. But once grasped, it can offer tremendous peace–and impetus for positive change.

I will share a whole lot more on their paradoxical perspectives in future posts, as well as the story of how I got started doing this work, and just what or who I mean when I refer to the Guides.

In the meantime, I wish you Love, Light, and the awareness of Divine support as we make our way forward in these uncertain times.